Unto Whom The Blame Should Be Placed
by Shell-Shocked-NinjaTurtleGal
Summary: (Spoilers for S2 finale!) After the disastrous events on Malachor, Kanan becomes very much concerned about Ezra. Knowing that his Padawan has been trying to open the Sith holocron, Kanan knows he must confront Ezra. And this time, he isn't confronting Ezra as his mentor, but rather as a father. (slight AU where Ezra doesn't open the holocron at the end of the finale!)
**Hello! So I saw the season 2 finale, and OMG! It was amazing! And this idea hit me, so TA-DA! This oneshot came to be!**

 **I'm also considering a dimension-travel fic! I know I already have "Paradox of The Force", but I am, at the moment, unable to come up with new ideas to continue it! So I'm considering writing another dimension-travel fic, but it would be very different from "Paradox of The Force"! For example, in the other dimension Luke and Leia wouldn't be toddlers, they'd be Ezra's age! Also it would include Kanan being blind (it would take place after the season 2 finale) and it would tie into this oneshot in regards to Ezra stopping his attempts at opening the holocron! If I do write this fic, though, it does not, repeat, DOES NOT, mean that I am giving up on "Paradox of The Force", that story is simply on hiatus until my inspiration for it returns! So please let me know if you'd like to see that type of story, and if you have any ideas share them!**

 **Disclaimer's on my prof.!**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

The past two-and-a-half weeks had been disturbingly silent and tense for the Ghost crew. Between the loss of Ahsoka and Kanan's blindness, everything had seemed to come to a screeching halt in their lives. The Rebellion continued on, of course- the loss wasn't as personal for most of them, though many felt sorrow for the loss of Ahsoka.

The crew and Rex, though, were allowed to take some personal time, staying at the new base that was still under construction while a good portion of the Rebellion returned to doing what they did best: wreaking havoc on the Empire.

In the past couple of weeks, each member of the crew had found something to do: Sabine, of course, absorbed her time in her art. Rex spent his time overseeing construction on the base and putting the makeshift shooting range some others had set up nearby to good use. Zeb would alternate between training with his Bo-Rifle and lounging in the little relaxation area he had set up a short ways from the base. Hera would go between working on the Ghost and helping with the construction of the base, and Chopper spent his time helping her. Kanan, having lost his sight, spent much time teaching himself to use the Force as his metaphorical eyes- a skill he remembered a select few Jedi back in the day using when the Clone Wars had resulted in them being blinded. This was a slow process, but having almost three whole weeks of non-stop practice helped him greatly- or at least enough that he could get around without help and with very few accidents that involved bumping into things or tripping.

And then Ezra...

Ezra had taken both the losses of Ahsoka and Kanan's eye sight the worst. The boy blamed himself, and it was obvious. He spent almost every hour in his quarters with the blasted holocron they'd retrieved, and this concerned Kanan greatly. It was a Sith holocron, Ezra could very well be effected by the artifact. But Kanan knew he couldn't outright tell Ezra to stop, the boy was too stubborn, this was his way of trying to make up for what he thought was his fault and he wouldn't just stop trying to open the holocron if Kanan told him to.

Of course Kanan had tried to talk with the youth. Blast it, Hera and Rex tried! But Ezra refused to come out or to talk. He only left for food or the 'fresher, and that was it. Before their first week of rest had even passed, Kanan could feel tiny fluctuations in the Force, could sense tinges of darkness, from _Ezra_. And it scared Kanan.

Kanan wanted so badly to help his young Padawan...

Kanan heaved a heavy sigh as he stood, his legs protesting slightly at the movement as Kanan had been sitting for a good two hours. Taking a moment to carefully reach out through the Force, Kanan managed to slowly make his way out of his quarters and into the small main corridor of the _Ghost_. Carefully moving along, the Jedi headed towards the kitchen, a hand on one of the steel walls to help guide him. He reached the door and went to hit the control panel-

The door opened of its own accord, and there in the doorway was Ezra. Kanan would know his Padawan's presence in the Force anywhere, and so he knew he was not mistaken.

"Ezra..!"

The boy seemed alarmed that his mentor knew it was him.

"Uh, y-yeah. Hey Kanan."

The boy went to push past him, but Kanan was quick to take hold of the teen's shoulder. He finally had Ezra out of his room and he wasn't about to pass this chance up.

"Hey, we need to talk."

Ezra shifted a bit in a nervous manner.

"I, uh, this isn't a good time, maybe later?"

Kanan frowned, shaking his head.

"No, it can't wait until later, and I know you aren't busy. You plan to lock yourself up in your room again, and that doesn't count as being 'busy'."

Kanan felt Ezra wince at this, the youth knowing he'd been caught redhanded.

"I...Okay. We can talk."

Kanan nodded, his grip loosening slightly on the teen's shoulder.

"Good. Come on, let's go to the briefing room."

Ezra nodded, Kanan feeling the motion. The man was somewhat surprised as Ezra took one of his hands and gently pulled him along, serving as a guide. Ezra's hand was dwarfed by Kanan's own, a painful reminder that despite his time on the ship, Ezra was still too small for one his age. Ezra was careful to take things at a pace Kanan could keep up with, and he would occasionally nudge Kanan over a bit to avoid any obstacles. The boy made a good set of 'eyes', Kanan mused, as they quickly reached the large room. With no one else on the ship, the only sounds that could be heard were the inner-workings of the ship and Ezra's soft, barely audible breaths.

Finding the bench seat, Kanan sat and Ezra released his hand, remaining standing. Kanan could hear the boy shuffling a bit, the boy obviously antsy.

"So, what did you want to talk about?"

Kanan smiled slightly. Ezra, always one who was straight to the point, even now. But the smile on Kanan's lips soon gave way to a neutral expression.

"I want to know how you're doing."

The statement seemed to catch Ezra off guard, as the teen's shuffling halted.

"I...What do you mean? I've been doing fine-"

Even with his eyes covered, Kanan could still pull off a berating expression.

"Ezra, I've known you for a year now. You should know by now that I can tell when you're lying."

Ezra huffed, and Kanan could tell that he was frowning at him.

"What do you mean? I really _am_ okay, Kanan!"

Kanan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Sometimes he wondered why his young friend had to always be so stubborn...

"Ezra," Kanan shifted so that his elbows rested on his knees, his hands limp in his lap as he turned his head in Ezra's direction. "I know you've been trying to open that Sith holocron we recovered." A hitch in Ezra's breathing revealed that the teen hadn't expected this, he'd obviously thought Kanan hadn't known that he had it. "Yeah, I know you have it. I might not be able to see, Ezra, but I can feel the fluctuations in the Force when you try to open it, how _dangerously close_ you get to the dark side. And I can't help but be worried."

A flood of shame came from Ezra, the sensation unpleasant for Kanan, but he didn't give any indication of it. The soft shuffle of feet alerted Kanan that the boy had turned away, probably looking at the floor with guilt if Kanan had to guess (and considering how close he and Ezra were, Kanan knew that his guess was surely right).

"I..."

"Why are you trying to open that holocron?" Kanan asked. His voice was soft and warm, with no hint of accusation. Right now, an accusatory tone would only make things worse, after all. There was a moment of silence as Ezra hesitated. The moment stretched out into five long minutes, and just as Kanan began to think Ezra wouldn't reply-

"...Its all my fault..."

The answer, spoken so hushed and breathlessly that Kanan couldn't hear it, made the Jedi straighten slightly.

"What?"

Kanan, his sense of hearing sharpened in the absence of his eyesight, could hear Ezra swallow a lump in his throat. The boy was trying not to cry, Kanan realized.

"I _said_ ," Ezra spoke up, voice now raised to a normal level but shaky and haggard. "Its all my fault. Us losing Ahsoka, you losing your sight, its _all my fault_." A choked sound that sounded suspiciously like an attempt to stifle a sob. "If I h-hadn't trusted him..."

Kanan's face fell as another sound left the boy, this time definitely a sob.

"Ezra-"

"T-the only way I can m-make things right is i-if I open that holocron so that w-we can stop the Empire, so no one else d-dies and-!"

" _Ezra_."

The boy feel silent as Kanan spoke his name once more. Sensing his Padawan looking at him, Kanan pat the spot beside him.

"Come here."

There was a split-second of hesitance, but Ezra did finally move over, gingerly sitting on the edge of the bench seat. The teen was surprised as he found himself being embraced, his head tucked under Kanan's chin. Kanan was never the touchy-feely type. The most he usually would give was a supportive pat on the shoulder or casual bumping of shoulders, now and then even a ruffling of hair, but hugs were as rare as Jedi were.

"Ezra, none of this is your fault."

"But-"

" _No_." Kanan cut him off. "Don't you ever think that this is your fault. You weren't the only one tricked, Ahsoka and I were, too. If anyone's to blame, its the Empire, not you. You're still just a child, Ezra. No one blames you for what's happened, because it _isn't your fault_."

Kanan didn't need his sight to know that Ezra was crying. He could feel the boy's shoulders wracking with sobs that he could hear, and tears began staining his shirt, making it wet. Yet Kanan didn't move. He simply continued to hold Ezra close, letting the boy cry into his chest. With an arm wrapped around his Padawan's shoulders, Kanan used his free hand to gently pet Ezra's hair in a soothing manner.

They remained this way for a good long while, with Ezra letting out the anger and sadness that had built up over the past couple of weeks, and Kanan just quietly holding him to his chest. It was only after half an hour that Ezra finally calmed down, or at least for the most part. Feeling the teen shift, Kanan let go of Ezra, letting him sit up straight. Kanan managed a small smile.

"You don't need to feel guilty, and you don't need to feel like you have to open the holocron. That holocron wasn't worth Ahsoka's life, and it isn't worth the possibility of you falling to the dark side." Reaching forward, Kanan took Ezra's face in his hands. "You don't need to open that holocron, Ezra, and you did nothing wrong."

Kanan felt Ezra shake his head.

"But your eyesight-"

"I'll learn to use the Force to guide me." A gentle smile. "But I can still see you, I promise."

Kanan's smile widened as he felt Ezra's confusion through the Force.

"What do you mean?"

"I still have my other senses. I can see your face." The older Force-weilder gently moved his thumbs over the boy's rounded face, the stubborn chin, and over the large blue eyes that belonged to the one who he saw as his own son. His thumbs came to rest just under Ezra's eyes, on the teen's tearstained cheeks, where Kanan carefully rubbed away the damp tracks. "The Force and my other senses can act as my eyes. Now, no more crying, alright? And no more thinking that everything that happen was your fault, and no more thinking you have to open that holocron. We'll find a better way to stop the Empire, but we're not about to risk losing you."

Kanan felt Ezra's cheeks twitch, a sign that the teen was smiling, if only slightly.

"O-okay."

Satisfied that Ezra was telling the truth, Kanan gently ruffled the boy's hair.

"Good. Now, why don't you and I go outside? We need to start trying to find a new way to do training, since things have changed." At Ezra's wince, Kanan lightly nudged him with an elbow. "Don't be like that, just think of it as a new challenge. Now c'mon, help me up. Every time I try and get up from a chair I nearly run into a wall..."

This managed to coax a startled laugh from Ezra, making Kanan grin. He and Ezra would get through this as they always had. Together.


End file.
